I am not a man.

Posted: 23 July 2010 in geekery

Wyllow: I got us a small shop vac.

Comhradh: um, ok.

Wyllow: Did you not want me to get the shop vac?

Comhradh: No, it’s OK.
It’s just that you’ve torn my scrotum clean off my body and made a purse out of it by purchasing what is essentially a power tool.

Wyllow:
would it make you feel better if i told you it was pink?

Comhradh: Absolutely not.

Wyllow:
I didn’t get a very big one, It’s actually one of the smallest ones

Comhradh:
I now have to urinate in a seated position.

Wyllow:
But It’s so cute

Comhradh:
I can imagine at this very moment it is chewing on the shredded remains of all of my sports jerseys like a poorly-trained and angry Labrador.
My shame will be evident to all who encounter me.
Men will avert their eyes, as if refusing to see my fate will ward off a similar one for them.
Women will make very little attempt to hide their amusement and contempt.
They will high-five you behind my back.  Possibly even in front of me.

Wyllow:
Would you mind if i shared this conversation?  Your humor should be shared.

Comhradh:
Yes, announce my shame to the internet.

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