I get it already, thanks.

Posted: 11 October 2010 in feminism, women's rights

I’m not a woman, so please excuse me if I step out of line here a bit:  I’m fucking tired of hearing about Breast Cancer Awareness.  Not breast cancer, Breast Cancer Awareness.  While I understand that the average American is dumber than a box of rocks and can be relied upon to get simple general-knowledge/current events questions embarrassingly wrong, I believe that it’s safe to say that any woman who isn’t aware of breast cancer has been living under a rock for the past few years.

I have three problems with the phenomenon that is BCA:

1)  Turning everything pink does does nothing to make people aware of anything except a vague concept that has to to with the more acceptable to ogle ladyparts,

2) The push for “awareness” doesn’t seem to include a lot of education on prevention.  Seems like they want people to be aware that there’s a shitload of pink crap to buy.

3) Marketing this to men is like marketing motor oil awareness to women.  Yes, I just fucking said that.  And I have a valid point – When it comes to the standard nuclear family, which, believe it or not, is the standard, the woman almost always the person in charge of the family’s medical care.  It’s just the way our society has shaken out.  The man, on the other hand, handles the vehicle.  Now, he may be rock-dumb when it comes to changing the oil, but head down to your local service station and tell me how many women you see changing an oil filter.  The point here is that BCA is a product marketing campaign and not much else.  So, instead of going after their target audience, they’ve decided to smear hot pink all over every NFL uniform.  See that, guys?  FOOTBALL BEER TITS.  Cowboys lost to the Titans yesterday, and then you went upstairs and jerked off to the thought of your girlfriend touching herself while completely missing the point of breast cancer.

The NFL’s target audience is not women.  Sure, the money-printing machine that it is has certainly tried to build its female demographic, but in the end, it plays to its base.  The fact that it has drenched itself in pink is proof of one thing:  it cares far more about its fans’ erections than its fans’ health.  It’s not trying to raise BCA for all the womenfolk it want to watch its product, it’s going with FOOTBALL BEER TITS.  If it cared about its target audience, we’d be seeing a lot more ads for Prostate Cancer Awareness.

Hey, I understand that telling your violently heterosexual audience that they’re going to die unless they allow their doctor to sodomize them probably isn’t a good money maker.  But when you consider that prostate cancer kills nearly as many men as breast cancer kills women annually, it’s a bit remiss on the part of the NFL to run with a marketing campaign that was obviously having no problems smearing itself over everything else.

For me, the worst part about it is the overt sexualization of breast cancer coupled with the disassociation of breast and women.  Women are more than a set of tits.  Cancer isn’t sexy.  Getting men to care about pink ribbons on a football is not doing anything to cure cancer or save lives – all it’s doing is selling FOOTBALL BEER TITS.  And it’s not even help save the lives of the people it’s being sold to.

So here’s my compromise:  Figure out a way to sexualize prosate cancer for women, and then have The View and Oprah aggressively market it.

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